Thursday, May 14, 2009

My first blog on fertility.

This is my first post about fertility something I will be focusing on until I conceive baby number two. I have alot on my plate and alot I want to talk about but this is going to be focus number one so here it goes.......

Today is CD (cycle day) 24. I am 3 dpo (days past ovulation) for the sixth cycle since my miscarriage.... I miscarried on September 22nd 2008 with my second pregnancy. It was heartbreaking I didn't know how to take it nor did I want to take it but there it was... I have been trying now since october to get pregnant again with no luck. I fear of things like PCOS the weight I have gained possible other reasons for infertility and so forth. Is it me is it my husband is it fate? I have come to the realization that it will happen when it is supposed to and I have put my trust in God. That being said it does not make it any easier! For the thing is I was supposed to be having a baby tomorrow actually if I would not have miscarried! I am trying to not focus on that anymore and just the journey that is ahead of me.

This cycle is looking good but so did some in the past few months however there are differences I feel I should note to you the reader. I have been taking my prenatal vitamins something I stopped out of depression from loosing the baby, I have been charting more regular and have been drinking more water and had EGCM (egg white cervical mucus) when I ovulated! The holy grail of fertility! I have had it before yes but not in consecutive with positive opk's. So it's looking good. I am already experiencing a few symptoms which could be attributed to many factors; pms, wishful thinking, early pregnancy symptoms from the egg meeting the sperm???? ( We can only hope!) Ahhhhhhh heaven help me I always get my hopes up. Something else I did differently this cycle now don't laugh too hard.... ready????????? ok well I showered before each baby dance ;) why is that important? well I will tell you showers relax me they are my meditation, my soothing drink lol. And right before we well you know BABY DANCED!! I went and took a relaxing shower. And as any TTC'er should know (trying to conceiver lol) stress will stop you from getting pregnant. So there I was each time showering then doing the deed then relaxing some more!!!

Will all of this work? you tell me or better yet the pee stick will in 11 days. That's right I'm holding out the whole 2ww (two week wait) and not giving in and checking too early. I have been let down too many times with those things and yet I'm addicted to the stick as they say. But you know something I am greatful, I know now a whole new world and it is called infertility, I understand even if it is just an ounce of what so many woman go through all over the world. Youtube has a wonderful support and I love so many of the people on there and feel for them so deeply. Bless all of you that have put up with me and read this whole darn thing it really means alot. I will keep you all updated on what the pee stick tells me..... ttfn!!!